"If you are concerned about being abusive with your partner, ask yourself these
questions and consider them as the warning signs of a problem."
- Was there violence in your family?
- During conflict do you often threaten someone, break things, punch walls,
slam doors, ignore your partner, or leave?
- Do you have mood swings, where one moment you feel loving and affectionate,
and the next moment angry and threatening?
- Have you ever used physical violence (shoved, grabbed, hit, slapped,
choked, etc.) your partner, or any past partners?
- Do you tend to blame others for your behavior, especially your partner?
- Are you a very jealous person?
- Do you try to control how your partner thinks, dresses, who she sees, how your partner
spends their time, how your partner spends their money?
- Do you try to discourage your partner from seeing their friends or family?
- Do you get angry or resentful when your partner is successful in a job or hobby?
- Do your conversations quickly escalate into threats of separation or
- Do you ever threaten to hurt your partner, yourself, or others, if your partner
- Do you do or say things that are designed to make your partner feel "crazy" or
- Do you blame alcohol, drugs, stress, or other life events for your
- Do you feel guilty after aggressive behavior and strive for your partner's
- Do you think that you could never live without your partner, yet other times want your partner
- Do you use sex, money, or other favors as a way to "make up" after
- Is your partner afraid of you sometimes?