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Sexual Abuse Alert List
for Children and Teens

Although this list was originally published in 1982, it is still very relevant today. This list was prepared by the Child Sexual Abuse Clinical Consultation Group at Harborview Medical Center in Seattle, Washington.

Children/Teens should be concerned if an older person or adult is demonstrating one or more of the following behaviors with them:-

Treating you different from other kids.

Wanting to spend time alone with you, making excuses to go places or have others leave.

Asking you to do things that involve physical contact, like giving backrubs, washing back.

Doing things to you that involve physical contact, giving backrubs, massaging you, wanting to help you wash.

Accidentally-on-purpose touching your private parts - brushing against breasts while wrestling, rubbing body against yours.

Putting lotion or ointment on when mother or others are not around or when nothing is wrong.

Accidently-on-purpose coming into your room while you are undressed or in the bathroom while you are in there.

Not respecting your privacy, coming in your room without knocking, not allowing you to close doors to bathroom or bedrooms.

Asking questions or making accusations about sexual things between you and boyfriends.

Teaching sex education by showing pornographic pictures, showing his body or touching yours.

Saying sexual things about your body or how you dress.

Talking to you about sexual things he has done.

Telling you private things about his wife/your mother.

Saying you are special, different, only one who really understands, better than his wife.

Treating you like an adult or him acting like a child.

Giving you special privileges or favors and making you feel obligated.

Treating you meaner than others.

Not letting you have friends or do things that other kids your age do.

Telling you not to tell your mother or other people about things that happen between you.

Coming into your bedroom at night.

Accidentally on purpose letting his robe fall open, walking around without clothes on.

Sexual abuse isn't always penetration. There are many forms of abuse. It may involve touching, constant comments or other behavior that makes you feel uncomfortable. Your gut instinct may be telling you something is wrong - TRUST YOUR FEELINGS!

Sexual offenders come in all shapes and sizes. Some of the behavior that is listed above, is what is called a "grooming process". That is a period of time in which the offender "tests" your reactions. It gives the offender time to discover how far he can go and whether or not you will tell anyone.

If these things are happening to you, find an adult you trust and talk to them about it. You could talk to the school counselor, a relative, friend, your doctor or contact a crisis line or sexual assault center in your area. If someone is doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable, it is important for you to find someone to check it out with. Don't be embarrassed to ask questions.


2000 Dennice is solely responsible for the opinions expressed 

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